he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize