We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
