please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
