ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
