Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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