Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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