He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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