in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
