if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
