Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she smelled like a LAN party
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
