I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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