'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize