would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
