if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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