Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Randomize
