well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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