mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
