no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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