Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry JimInNYC hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(573): View more from Missouri

I can tuck mytits in my pants

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(703): View more from Virginia

i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)

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(586): View more from Michigan

just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall

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(404): View more from Georgia

I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.

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(925): View more from California

At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.

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(917): View more from New York City

level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.

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(905): View more from Ontario

Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09

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