Do vagina's smell?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
