so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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