You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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