she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
My vagina is officially offended.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
