no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Randomize
