Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
