A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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