Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
