Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
