And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
