margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
