so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
