i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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