Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
