ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I just found puke in my bra..
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
