: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
no, he came in my armpit
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Randomize
