your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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