hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
