I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
