Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
