All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize