It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Couch. On fire.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
