this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize
