girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
