i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
