dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
They took my balls.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Randomize
