Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
