he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
