was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
