I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
