my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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