Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
